"I mostly feel like you're still on the first one," he says, made awkward by the intensity of Quentin's contrition, just as he was when Quentin first strode away from him in the garden.
"I've had outbursts on everyone since I got here. I just -"
Everyone in the Citadel of Eyes knows how to be delicate. Even Hemiola understands enough without pushing, and is constitutionally inclined not to, as an attendant servitor who considers him its charge. His therapeutic interrogators, especially, are masters of subtlety. With them, Jedao simply, categorically avoids anything he doesn't want cracked open; with Quentin, so many of their foundational assumptions are different that Jedao had to explain things, old painful things he'd never cared enough to excavate before. But Quentin made him care. And Fives, and Iris, and others. Nothing he's known could have prepared him for the barge.
"You made me - want to be understood. You made me want to be honest with you and I don't know how to do it without falling apart, but that's not something you did wrong."
no subject
"I've had outbursts on everyone since I got here. I just -"
Everyone in the Citadel of Eyes knows how to be delicate. Even Hemiola understands enough without pushing, and is constitutionally inclined not to, as an attendant servitor who considers him its charge. His therapeutic interrogators, especially, are masters of subtlety. With them, Jedao simply, categorically avoids anything he doesn't want cracked open; with Quentin, so many of their foundational assumptions are different that Jedao had to explain things, old painful things he'd never cared enough to excavate before. But Quentin made him care. And Fives, and Iris, and others. Nothing he's known could have prepared him for the barge.
"You made me - want to be understood. You made me want to be honest with you and I don't know how to do it without falling apart, but that's not something you did wrong."